Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Impatient at 39 weeks.


This photo is from Monday (39 weeks on the dot).  I've been getting so impatient.  You know how you don't really realize your expectations until they come up unmet?  Yeah.  I think I "thought" she might be here a little early.  And it turns out I really thought she'd be here early.  I realized this after our appointment on Monday.  I hadn't progressed as much as I had hoped.  And I left completely deflated and bummed.  As much as I'm not ready, I was sooo ready.  p.s.  These are times when you feel extra lucky for having a sweet and supportive husband.  I feel lucky in general.  Or thankful, I should say.  But I've felt extra thankful throughout this whole process.  He let me cry it out.  So, it's back to learning the lesson of patience and God's timing (again and again and again).  And enjoying the moments I've got right now.  And letting go of the anxiety (my nerves are starting to get the best of me) that comes with the unknown.  I keep listening to one of my favorite worship songs, The Desert Song...knowing that I can rejoice, because my God does provide.  Even when I'm bummed and cranky.  Isn't it funny that in a few weeks or even a few days, Eloise will be here, and I'll most likely have forgotten exactly how this all felt.  The discomfort and random pains, the impatience.  The anxiety (to be replaced by new ones, I'm sure...haha).  We're such funny creatures, aren't we? :)

2 comments

  1. Good luck, Colleen! I'm checking your blog every day hoping to see little Eloise on here soon :)

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  2. Feeling so impatient too. Trying to learn (yes again, and again, and again) patience and to trust His timing. Who knows maybe E and E will be birthday buddies! ;)

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